Monday, December 31, 2012

And ain't it grand....just another year....

Ok....every year getting through the Holidays seems to get harder and harder.  Course, if there wasn't so much ice I wouldn't fall so much, and as they say, the older you are they harder you fall.  Ouchers and stuff.  Well, see, the Friday before Christmas we got a huge type blizzard.....ended up with about a foot and a half of snow.  Pretty darn windy, too, but it wasn't too bad if the Ex wasn't talking.....then the wind was moderate.   Then, the friday past we got another seven inches of snow.  This winter is overdosing on Viagra iffen you ask me.  We didn't get this much snow all of last winter and we still have three months left to go.  But we are a hardy breed in the Great White North and  most are optimmistic....but I guess that depends on whether you are one of those that thinks of your driveway being half full or half empty.  I love the irony of going out in the cold and snow, busting my hump shoveling this crap.... and then having to come inside and ice up my back.  But winter is here to stay...even the most hardy of folk have finally put away their BBQ grills and patio furniture.  Course.... now that we have all this snow...they are saying the temps are gonna fall below zero.  I'm gonna fall under a extra blanket....iffen I doan fall and kill myself on the ice, is what, see!

Boy Wonder made it back from LA before the weather turned nasty.  After a cursory amount of time with his parental units....(most time being spent at Peabody's seeing who else made it home) he packed up his snow shoes and heading to the Lower Eastern part of the Upper Peninsula of Michigan.....which is only slightly less boring than the Upper Western Part of the Upper Peninsula only causee it takes less time to get there, see.
So I guess I have it correct...Max, Mark, Chris, Matt, Jess,Jim and a half barrel of beer, snowshoes, lentil soup, chili, beer cheese soup.  Ah, the young and there liquids!  I am sure Jim remembered the tequila as he is always been very concerned with having a balanced diet.  Maybe thirty years back I ould have been interested in that kind of fact I guess I did do a couple of trips like that, but now....if I can't use my bicycle...forget about it.

 The Princess screwed up her car.  The transmission.  Could be a gonna.  The only saving grace is that it is a vintage Volvo...we got almost five years out of it with the two kids and the parts dealer will give almost as much as we have paid in repairs over the it's not so bad.  She is acting like there is no other car in the World, though, and has not been happy.  I am less than happy....I will be crawling up under that sucker in a few days and seeing if it is just the linkage.  Lucky me.  But I am blessed in having a daughter that thinks a good time does not entail a trip to the UP to get drunk with her friends.  They plan on doing that in the comfort of her apartment for a New Years celebration.

Ah, yes, New Years.  Whoopee.  I like to clebrate in a sensible way.  Gonna met Baseball Ed for a couple of beers.  Found him some old Detective Magazines from the 1960's.  Didn't pay much and it will keep him out of trouble for hours.  Billa Lang may stop by.  He spent four days with his girlfriend up in the UP skiing(ya, like what's up with theat UP shit anyways....and frankly. a man his age should take up something more sensible, like knitting or crochet, or Dominoes. Billa suffers from arrested develpment...but he can never remember what age he was arrested at, though I think it was once in '74 and maybe another time......who knows.  I cannot make that shit up, really.  I am not sure who else will show up on New Years early afternoon....Joe Cool has to work, Nick was there for the Packer game yesterday and probably will not show.  Maybe some other folks....but me...There is a pork roast in the crock post, some aged Brick Cheese....and I have some DVD's to watch...gonna do a Jack Benny Retrospective.  I always liked Jack.  A man that stops aging at 39 is a smart man.

oh well.....hope everyone had a good Christmas......and to all A Bloggy New Year.

Saturday, December 15, 2012

Dear little kids.......

I am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorryI am so sorry

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

So.... a couple of Holiday Yolks

Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly
. 'In honor of this holy season' Saint Peter said, 'You must each
possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven.'

The man from England fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter.
He flicked it on. 'It represents a candle', he said.

'You may pass through the pearly gates' Saint Peter said.

The man from Scotland reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys.
He shook them and said, 'They're bells.'

Saint Peter said 'You may pass through the pearly gates'.

The Irish man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally
pulled out a pair of women's panties.

St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, 'And just what
do those symbolize?'

The Irishman replied, 'These are Carols.'

Ole and Lena were sitting down to their usual cup of morning coffee listening to the weather report over the radio.   "There will be 3 to 5 inches of snow today and a snow emergency has been declared.  You must park your cars on the odd numbered side of the streets."
Ole said, "Jeez, okay, best move da car" and got up.
Two days later, they were sipping their coffee when the weather man came on again. "There will be 4 to 7 inches of snow today and a snow emergency has been declared.  You must park your cars on the even numbered side of the streets."
Ole said, "Jeez, okay, I'll go move da car" and got up.
Three days later, Ole and Lena were again drinking coffee when the weather man said, "There will be 10 to 13 inches of snow today and a snow emergency has been declared.  You must park your cars on the..."
The power went off.
Ole looked baffled. "Vat am I gonna to do now, Lena? Where do I park da car?" he asked.
"Aw Ole, yust leave de car in de garage," she said.

Monday, December 10, 2012

Let's remember the Job Creators.....

Well, the first snowfall happened yesterday.  Not enough to inconvenience anyone much, but an amount significant to let you know that Winter is here...and it will not go away for a few months so you best get used to it, find something to do, put the bike away, find the gloves and shovel.  Time to clean up stacks of stuff that has accumulated. And that is how I found her again.

 It was last fall that the magazine exchange thing happened.  Joe had a bunch of old Playboy magazines from the late 80's and early 90's, brand new, still in their plastic mailing bags.  Someone had given him a subscription and he never read them.  Gave them to me.  Kind of interesting....the movies they panned that turned into big hits, the Sports predictions that they got right, the ones that were wrong.  Electronic gadgets that were going to set the World ON FIRE....stuff like that.  I passed them on to Dave...and in return he gave me a bunch of old National Geogrphics from the late 70;s and mid 80's.  Those were very interesting.  I gave some to the Ex and she gave me a bunch of old gardening magazines that I gave to Brian....that he ended up taking to an old folks was fun, it a low key way....everything was old enough to be just slightly quaint.

There was one of the National Geo's that got to me.  A 1985 cover that had, like the Stones said, 'The Girl With The Far Away Eyes' on it.  She seemed beautiful to me.  They eyes grabbed you, though, in a way that was sad and sang back centuries.  I reread the article, laboriously, the eyes continue to fade, but it was a real kick in the Gut to read it.

Do the History yourself.  It would not help anyone for me to do it.  It was 1985 when the article was written.  It talks of how the Soviets arrived; at that time they had already been fighting Afghan tribes, political factions, guerrillas from Pakistan.  It tells of refugees living away from their homeland areas.  It talks of how America had, at that time, already channeled over $325mm in weapons to groups fighting the Russians.

....and now some of those same weapons are used to kill Americans.

....but we still do not GET IT....there is no winning in Afghanistan.  Politicians and Pundits will tell you it is now America's longest WAR.....but the poeple their, just like the Vietnamese, have been fighting for Centuries.  The British failed there in the mid-Nineteenth Century...they could not succeed.  Alexander the Great could not conquer them in 325 BC....and no invaders in between could.   It is easy for the press to call those fighting American forces, "Insurgents", which takes away who they really are...Pushtans,Tajiks, Badakshis,Nuristanis,Uzbeks, Hazara, Turkomens, Baluch....and it is there land.  I do not understand insurgent.  It is a made up word.  Refugee is not.  Many of the native people of Afghanistan now live in Pakistan.  Refugees.

Obama has set a timetable to Withdraw from Afghanistan.  2014.  Millions yet to spend.  Some Republicans are against a timetable.  Said it will let the 'other' side prepare.  For what... I am not sure. Maybe to build homes and plant crops.  To have lives. To have families.  We did not win.  We never could have won.

But we could have educated our children without calling our teachers 'Greedy' for asking for decent wages.
We could have created a decent economic structure for our country that did not rely on building weapons, rockets and missiles.
We could have fed our poor, healed our sick, housed our homeless.
 But those are just weasely, greedy takers that have no place in American plans.
We still have insurgents to kill.  Perhaps we need more American Insurgents.

There is more saber rattling amongst the smug and rich.....send guns and bullets to Syria, Egypt, Libya.  Made me think of an old song.....from a different that cost a lot.

Yupperz..... the times they aren't changing.   I do not want to see another girl with far away eyes.

Wednesday, December 5, 2012

the dog ate my blog post....

or at least it sounds good.  and it's not like I haven't been writing...but beats me where it went.

See, I had this dream...and it was really really strange and it woke me up in the middle of the night...and I sat down, well, I did take a leak first, see, but then I wrote it all down and it was in my back pocket, well most of it, cause I only wrote down as much as I could remember and I figured that once I reread what I had written the rest would come back to  me, but that didn't happen mostly because I had said I would watch the ex's dog when she went down to the Capital for some sinister, clandestine, socialistic, Commie Teacher's Union meeting thing and gosh I just turned my back on that little bugger for maybe two minutes, three tops, I swear it wasn't much more than that....but golly see all AI was doing was getting a glass of lemonade outa her refrigerator and when I looked back well, his mouth was full of all those yellow tablet pages and he sas chewing and chewing and boy&Howdy I was about to get real pissed at him when he just kinda looked at me, smaked his lips......and said," not bad.  pour me a glass , willya?"

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Thanksgiving.... and men of a certain age

I guess I could blame Dimly....but that would be pointless.  He has been a good friend for almost the last 40 years and I can honestly say, with good pride and pleasure, that I have never been mad at him a day since we met.  Course, the same cannot be said of his twin brother, Dumly...and he is dear to me as well...but him and I are another story altogether and it ain't no deal now and if I do not write this immediately I am sure to be distracted, distraction being a hobby I do well.  So...this is what happened and I will not edit this crap or it will just sit there unwritten and unread.
Now....see, it is a beautiful day.  Sunny, clean.fresh and the Holiday tomorrow should show temperatures up close to the sixties.  Maybe it is Indian Summer, though I am more inclined to call it Polack Spring as in when most of the white men around here totally forget what season it is and put there shorts back on.  They say you can fool anyone once, but sure as I still like a good beer, the weather in Wisconsin can fool you ALL the time. But that is no never mind,see, and has only a passing role in what happened. Not so much that ANYTHING was just an email,see, but it offers a quality to my feelings and those are precious if you want them to be and I sure enough do.
So, as is my habit of morings, I check the email on my phone, I do it on the phone cause not only is it handier, but I do not have an internet connection at home.  Now, I need to do this becasue, gosh, I may have won the Nigerian Lottery or something, but, as per usual I didn't and there was no notice that the rainbow got stuck outside my back door and all I have to do is go out and get that pot-o-gold.  Nope, nonesuch.  What he had sent was a chain email of sorts...forwarded from someone else...the gist of it was that on such and such time we should all raise a glass in memory of LT.  If you want to participate send your phone number back and it will be blind CC'd to the others on the list and you can make a phone call or two or so and share LT stories, of which there are many, most intricate and ludicrous.  Now, that did not strike me as such a bad idea.  LT has been dead just a few years and it would be good to hear from some of those was a strange collective of strange guys, the mid-70's being what they were and all and I think I am in on this.

But it got me in a mood.  I just found out that Burkie died a few days back.  I missed the news and the funeral and wake. Now, he was not a close friend, but I had hoisted a few with him over the years and shared some laughs.   Sharing a laugh with Burkie was like sharing a ride in an old beat up car running down a gravel road on the way to a beer party.  You never knew what was going to come out of his mouth....but it always seemed to make you grin with him.

So Burkie is now just like LT...dead and gone and here with us forever. And so is Bruiser and Spare Wheels, Kid Curry, Wolfgang, Red Fred, Mad Dog, Sweet Rohl, aw, shit..... it pains me.  And that ain't no never mind either, I guess.  The real deal is..... that you knew these men...and they were the fabricate of life that you wore, the wind that sailed around you and you always know that you were blessed to have know them.  I am thankful for that.  I guess that is what Thanksgiving is to me......just a goddam feeling in the bottom of my poscket that I can always reach into and grab and for that, I can never be broke.

So I went out today with a bit of a funk feeling.  Thanksgiving had always been one of my favorite days in the past; the groaining board of food my mother and grandmother would assemble...the Packer-Lion game on TV...sitting in the leaf pile with Nancy in the moonlight under the oak tree..the arrivals and departures of family and friends who had gathered together to was   ....well it was and there ain't no mone to it than that.  Now...well, things are different.  Pretty much by choice I do not go anywhere.  I'll make myself a bit of supper and watch football.  The weather is expected to be good and perhaps I will fit in a bike ride or so.  It ain't no deal.  I talked with Billa Lang a day or so past...and the nub of that is, well...remember not what favors you have given to others, but all the good stuff that has been given, unasked for, to you.  Not a bad way to think of things.

The days go on and we get old.  There will be more family and friends that will pass away in the coming year....and I now resolve never to regret their passing as much as I will give thanks and joy for their 'forever presence. That would not be shabby.  I got to thinking of a song my old buddy Lightning Dot used to love....a song written as a condensation of the Rip van Winkel story.  Had not thought of it for years.  Still good.

 Ya'll be good...and remember phone calls from the heart, in the heart....are cheap and valuable.

Sunday, November 18, 2012

You are what (& where) you eat...

So of late, or of lately, or maybe later than you think.... The owners of Papa John's Pizza and a large franchisee owner of some Denny's restaurants are blowing their nose all over the place saying, "oh, oh...Obamacare is gonna put me outa business!  I will have to lay off people!  I will have to cut wages!  Hours will be cut!"  Well, the long distance past I will admit to having eaten at a Denny's and have had Papa John's Pizza.  And I now avoid both places....because...well... the food really really sucks.

But, I do like Pizza...and my section of beautiful downtown Wisconsin is blessed with a good half dozen 'non-franchise' places to get a good pie.  Ain't no deal, really...but it got me to thinking a bit of a Pizza place down in Madison, WI.....Ian's
They hit the news...NEWS almost two years ago...during protests at the State Capital when Scott Walker was doing his Draconian measures to destroy teachers unions.  It started when someone asked, at the end of the night, if there were any left=over pizzas they could take up to the capital to feed some of the folks doing an all night vigil/protest inside the capital building.  Ian's said, "sure". And then..... on twitter, FB, emails the word spread.  And phone orders started pouring in.. eventually folks from all 50 states and some 60 foreign countries using credit cards to donate pizzas to the protesters.  And... Ian's delivered.  Now...there are two Ian's pizzas in Madison, one in Milwaukee and one in Chicago.  The guy worked hard...had a business model he wanted to work with...and paid off.  And this is not a 'usual pizza the clip.

and so it went.  Ian's worked around the clock.  Employees worked double shifts.  Their dough machine broke down.  At the time there were numerous stories on the net, Youtube, in the print media.
Anywayz..... So the CEO of Papa John's....The Dude from Denny's... they are gnashing their teeth and flapping their gums...because...oh oh oh...treating people like people is SO UNFAIR and gosh....would COST ME MONEY......

AND, the founder of Ian's sticks with what he wants to do... and writes his philsophy up in a little newslateer on there web page....check this out...
Dear You,
The ongoing political events here in Madison have been nothing short of historic for the people of Wisconsin and, on a much smaller scale, Ian’s Pizza. Starting on February 16th, Ian’s Pizza was entrusted with delivering pizzas to demonstrators on behalf of people from all 50 states, over 60 countries and Antarctica. Media coverage soon followed with articles mentioning us by name in newspapers all around the world. The following on Ian’s Pizza on State’s Facebook page alone grew from 3,900 to almost 15,000 fans in one week. Given all of the media scrutiny, not surprisingly, many people have asked what Ian’s Pizza stands for.

When I founded Ian’s Pizza 10 years ago, I wanted to create a business that could make a positive difference in the lives of our employees and customers. I wasn’t convinced I could change the world, but within the confines of the four orange walls in our original store I was confident Ian’s could be a force for good. Over the past decade Ian’s Pizza has grown to four stores, yet the values, which were so important to me in beginning, persist throughout our company today.
One of the greatest contributions we can make to our community is to be a good employer. We believe being a good employer means, above all, treating people with dignity. We don’t believe yelling is an effective means of communicating with each other. We cherish greeting our co-workers with a smile and sharing a beer after work. Disagreements are okay, demeaning comments are not.
We realize that you have many choices when you want to go out for pizza. While we work very hard to serve you the best pizza we know possible, what makes Ian’s Pizza unique and what truly is our greatest asset, is the people who work with us. Simply stated, our goal as a business is to continually humanize our work environment and personalize your customer experience.
In addition to treating our staff with dignity, our leaders are also expected to practice Servant Leadership. The practice of Servant Leadership, which was coined by Robert Greenleaf in a book of the same name, simply states that the job of the leader is to serve the organization and not the other way around. I understand Servant Leadership to mean that ultimately, as a leader at Ian’s, it’s my job to help our staff be successful in theirs.
The tangible employee benefits we believe in include the practice of paying good wages, providing generous vacation time (long-time employees receive one month paid vacation each year), and matching employee’s 401K contributions. We also offer 100% employer-paid health insurance to full-time employees. Health insurance is an issue which resonates very strongly with me. My dad was involved in various entrepreneurial activities while I was growing up and for most of my adolescence we only had catastrophic medical insurance. The lack of adequate health insurance was a concern my parents passed on to me. In April of 2002 we began offering 100% company paid health insurance for our staff and have done so ever since.
We are an open book management company. Staff are required to know and report on company financials during staff meetings. Bonuses, based on the company’s profitability, were first paid at our original store on a trimester basis in 2005. Our other stores have paid bonuses on an annual basis, when possible. Although many small businesses might be leery of disclosing their finances, we’ve found that operating in a system of total financial transparency results in better productivity and financial performance.
Lastly, we believe in providing a path to ownership for qualified staff. Initially, I was very cautious and even skeptical about growing the company beyond one store. Ultimately I reached the conclusion that expanding Ian’s would create opportunities for staff to remain working with us and still grow professionally. Today, our Chicago location is owned by a UW history major who worked with us through school, while our stores in Milwaukee and State St. are owned by several long-time employees.
For the sake of brevity I have not described our philosophies on food or customer service. (Please know that we have strong opinions on both subjects!) For now, let me conclude by stating what will come across as obvious to everyone, but during these heated times, might be forgotten by some: Ian’s Pizza is not a political party.
We stand in solidarity with anyone who shares our company’s values, but we don’t believe it’s our job to endorse a specific political entity. Despite the highly polarized political climate we live in, we feel food (especially pizza!) is something that brings us together regardless of political orientation. When you choose to order a pizza with us you are also supporting the practices I outline above.
This years marks our 10 year anniversary and I’d like to thank not only all of those who supported us these past several weeks but also over the past decade.
With love and appreciation,
Ian Wisconsin is not just a Bat shit crazy Governor,,,,, a moron VP candidate.....and Madison is NOT a typical city.....a former Governor, A decent Republican, once described Madison as, "a few square miles of insanity surrounded by the rest of the State"  which is about right.

Anywayz...maybe the point is that life is just stuff.... but we still choose, whether you are a customer or an owner....what you put on your pizza

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Can't see so well, but I listen real good....

whoa..... a hundred and fifty so years ago...... The Republicans, under Lincoln, fought to keep the Nation together.   NOW.... they want to secede.  A hundred and fifty so years ago, under Lincoln....the Republicans worked to end slavery.  NOW...with no leadership at all.... the idea of economic slavery seems like a good idea to them.  Boy..... me all to heck.... but it ain't no deal.  have a great night..........and may your doughnut be fresh in the morning.

Monday, November 5, 2012

Prince Rupert and the Gumboot Girls and some local jazz

I talk with my younger brother at least twice a week.   Mostly football, family, weather, politics....just sundry stuff.  He moved to Washington state some twenty years ago, near the Canadian border.  He likes it.  It suits him.
Brother John
Fifteen years ago he ran into a short Canadian woman, they fell in love and got married....etc etc etc.  The two of them make a strange looking pair.... he is about 6'8" and Linda is maybe 5'2"
They have a cozy place out in the country... he raises the chickens and tends the fruit trees...Linda does the plumbing and canning and freezing of stuff.  He works at an Athletic Complex managing the fields.  Linda is a field biologist for an International fishing commission.  They get along well.

But the real deal here, see, is Linda and the book Gumboot Girls.  Back in the 70's She moved from Saskatchewan.  To Northern British Columbia and met a whole bunch of women who worked the fish canneries, the lumber mills and what not.

Well.... yadda yadda....the women, through the miracle of the internet, have composed a book of their stories and reminiscences of those times.  I talked with Linda this morning.  On Thursday she is flying into Port Rupert, BC to visit with the women she knew then.  I am really excited for her.  Sounds like great fun.  I know John will call more when she is gone. He does miss her when her work or travels keeps her from home.  He calls me when he gets lonely for her.  Some quotes....

"We hiked into town every two weeks for supplies, mail, showers and beer. On more than one occasion as we headed out we saw a vehicle stranded on the beach, with no tire marks around it. It was usually a rental vehicle some unwitting tourists had been forced to abandon by the rising tide." -Margo Elfert

"The first part of our paddle/sail down the east coast of Graham Island, favoured by westerlies, was idyllic. When we ran out of freshwater one day and landed, walking up to the first house we saw, we noticed a dulcimer hanging from the wall. When the owner learned that we had a dulcimer in our kayak, he invited us to stay." -Lyn Pinkerton

We lived by a different time down there. Days of the week meant nothing, but seasons were all-important. We had no electricity, therefore not a lot of light other than daylight. Every hour of light was used to its fullest, even in the summer, a high energy time when we only got three or four hours of darkness." -Su-San Brown

So that is an unabashed plug for the book.... I told John and Linda I want a copy for Christmas...

 ohohoh... adn speaking of plugs....  local magazine ran a nice article about the jazz artists in Town.  I didn't think we had such a good group of artists laying good jazz... I need to go out more often

 READ story here

Friday, November 2, 2012

Why isn't Mitt more...... compaassionate?

ya know.... I just had a thought..... if Romneystiltskin really gave a shit about the people in NYC who have been adversely affected by this horrible storm............................ why , gees.... he would be passing the hat to collect money for all the out of work hookers.  I mean.... a girl has gotta.... eat, right?  But Mittstake?  he just gives canned speeches....

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Hurricane Mitt Blows Hard....and sucks badly...but Roy is all right by me

oh oh oh.... see, this is how it is.  I was getting into some of my favorite favoritist music this morning..... Roy Orbison.
Ya, ya, say what you will... but Roy had that voice... you know... the one that made countless panties wet at school dances amidst the crepe and balloons.  Ah, to be young and horny again!  Well, anyways.... I stumbled across Mitt Romney's Theme....  AW gees, yessirree Bob!!

Running SCARED!

Just runnin' scared, each place we go 
So afraid that he might show 
Yeah, runnin' scared, what would I do  
If he came back and wanted you
Just runnin' scared, feelin' low 

Runnin' scared, you love him so 
Just runnin' scared, afraid to lose 
 If he came back
 which one would you choose

Yupperz..... the "Dude had the chance to DO something... to act Presidential... and well gosh... he sure acted like .... an ass.  Ran out, bought 5K worth of soup and crackers....see, that is all Jersey and New York needs... just a soup kitchen is all...see, that'll fix 'em!  Aw, shit&whiskers.... the guy has got money stashed up his ass and the best he can do is 5K worth of doughnuts and diapers (which the goddam Red Cross says they don't, see, the need CASH and MONEY  which that cheap rich fucker will never part with)

But, and here is the is exactly how he would handle himself to get the country moving.....

Got some trillions in debt?  well, all we have to do is put some little cans at every 711 and Kwik Trip;;
and Wowzers.... the good old private sector can fix this in no time flat.  Aw, Jesus H. W. Christ!...And he flaps his goddam gums with his "We can't afford four more years..." drivel.   Damn...if I hear that stupid ad one more time today I will blow chunks, and gees, after a night of drinking beer and eating excessive amounts of left over Kit Kats, lemmee tell you.... that would not be pretty.

anywayz.... if you share a little disgustification like me... Check this site....Romney SUCKS

oh oh..... and get THIS..TRUMP EXTENDS HIS 'DEADLINE' FOR OBAMA TO TENDER HIS COLLEGE RECORDS....cause, shit, that Donald guy is compassionate and knows that the prisident is just a bit busy......check this link for Donald blows newz

Stuff!! that is another stupid shit singing an Orbison song...

Oh, you wished me well
You, you couldn't tell
That I'd been crying over you
Crying over you

When you said, "So long"

Left me standing all alone
Alone and crying, crying
Crying, crying


OH, GEES....NOW I am all upset.  I think I will hold a 'beer drive' to get me through .... send donations to Oblio's Lounge, Main St....Downtwon Oshkosh, 54901.... I promise to NOT share with either Mitt or Donal.... let them buy their own

Wednesday, October 31, 2012



When contacted Mittch said, "Hey, that Sandy Girl was a real bitch.  Screwed up my whole MoJo."

When queried further the Mittstake said, "Hey get outta my face. " The candidate then deposited another dollar bill in a G-string and said, "Listen, I got some private sector money to hand out.... my economy feels stimulated right now. So fuck off, ok"

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Donald Knows Best??!!?? and the Mitt has got some canned goods for you

 Well Gosh....The Trump has put his hair in his mouth, again.  Pretty much accusing the President of 'Politicizing' Hurricane  Sally.  Of course..... he is still iffed that Obama has ignored his 5MM dollar offer to show "documents"  .... I am guessing, though, that if any of his properties have been damaged during the storm... he would not be adverse to pocketing some cash.

Yuppers....and Rompney?  I tried goggling 'Mitt Romeny views on Hurricane Sally' and google produces a bunch of Lindsay Lohan quotes.    sheesh.
 ..... course, Mitt, who , on the campaign trail suggested FEMA be eliminated..... has been, ah, very presidential acting.

 .... in fact.... rather than doing a usual flip-flop.... hasn't said.... anything.

  Check the Link RIGHT HERE

ah, gees.... maybe I am  being too harsh on the jolly old fuck-wad.... I mean... he is trying to gosh.... he has started   ... ah, wait for it.....a can drive.   LET THEM EAT BEANS.....!!!!

.... GEES, Mitt.... does your campaign hand out Tums, too?

Monday, October 29, 2012

Hurricane?! Doesn't bother me....Mitt says {Fuck You"

Yessirre Bob.... Ol Mitt doan give a shit.  Hurricanes? 'fuck you'  Tornadoes?  Fuck you.  Droughts, floods, famine...?? "Fuck You"


You Betcha..... Mitt does not care about citizens with incomes under a Million!

And EVERYBODY knows that Santa and the Easter Bunny are goddam illegal immigrants just stealing American jobs.... and JUST GIVING THINGS AWAY.... like some fucking SOCIALISTS!

 think I'm kidding.... The goddam Bunny hangs out with that goddam socialist Muslim, Comunity goddam organizer in the White House.....I wanna see the goddam Rabbits BIRTH CERTIFICATE

Friday, October 26, 2012

Getting caught up with Larry and Trumping at the Snoring Dog

Ok.... just getting caught up.  Things have been weird lately... and busy.  The Boy was here for a wedding....and it made for a crazy, fun weekend, the daughter is fighting City Hall on Bogus Parking tickets.  I fought off a bit of flu.... and the political mess just keeps getting messier.  I did think of voting early and then just ignoring all the ads and fuss... but that would kind of like ignoring Thanksgiving by having a huge Turkey dinner in October.   Would rather take the fun out of it.... and besides.... I truly do like going to a polling place in November.

Well, anyways.... see, what went down is good old Larry from WOODGATE'S VIEW 
gave me this spiffy keen Sunshine award.... kind like one of those, gosh, I certainly like to stop at your blog thingees that used to go around .  they seem to have fallen out of fashion  which is too bad.  They told you a bit more about the writer you are reading... a little bit of aknowledgement... plus a good heads up for others to find some nice blogs.   OK...I am supposed to mention a few things about me... and then pass the award along as well as mention other blogs that are good... in my view.  So here are a few answered questions.....

Favorite Color: angst.  Angst fits in with absolutely everything in your wardrobe.  Plus it is usually permanent press.  I am also fond of melancholy.  It fits my wardrobe well, too.
Favorite Animal: three toed Sloth.  Any animal named after my favorite sin has gotta be good.  Plus three toes only makes it easy to clip one's nails.  Billa Lang is also a favorite animal, though I will never clip his toenails.

Favorite Number: 14.... cause thirteen is unlucky and fifteen would require me to take of at least one shoe and sock.  Makes sense, right.

Favorite Drink: hmmm...right now?  Beer.  Currently the Ranger IPA from New Belgium.  But that could change with eht next glass.

Facebook or twitter: FB .....I have been told Twitter is weird and I should never never use it.

Passion: well, it used to be Nancy, then it was Kathy, then Suzanne, then another Kathy....then I lost was all so long ago.  Beer is better.  Beer never divorces you and doesn't get upset if you don't rinse the glass well.

Giving or Receiving Gifts:  well.... I give as good as I get... it just depends on how much money I have, and as lately that is very little.... I am lining up on the receiving side

Favorite Day:   the one that is scrunched in there between sunday and monday  Or is it the one between saturday and sunday.  gees, that is a tough one. Of course, I am also fond of the day after Never.... which is when I pay bills.

Favorite Flower: whole wheat.

Favorite Food: Free.  You just can't beat free food.  But Cajun Meatloaf is right on up there....with roux gravy and pecan rice.  Red beans &rice with smoked pork chops is pretty darn nice, too....oh oh oh.....and chicken Cordon Bleu and a side salad... and... well, beer is good food, too. oh oh oh... and food for thought is decent, specially with some Dijon and an apple salad.

... so that is that.  Late, as usual, but very informing I am sure.  Soon I will find a place to stick that award on my blog, but in the mean time truck on over to Larry's place; it is a nice place to be.

Now.... I was supposed to pass this award on to other's... but it seems, as it were, that most everyone I would give it to, has already received it ....... so...just scroll down my blog list and you are bond to find someone you will like.

Now... see,  in the spirit of all that... I must mention Jean at SNORING DOG STUDIO

... cause there is a nifty little thread going on there about the Donald

Jean rather thinks.... and gees, she is rightie right as rain, that 'Trump' could very well be




As well as a nut case millionair-head.... well gosh.... I gotz inspired.... and added to the thread

SEE, like this:
      okjimm | October 26, 2012 at 11:28 am

      //eventually going to be a verb and a noun.// isn’t it already? Like, see,

      “I would love to go out with you Saturday, but I have to Trump my hair.” OR..

      .” Sure, I will pay you… The Trump is in the mail!” or…

      “Don;t count your Trumps until they are Booby-Hatched” Or, maybe…

      “You can’t tell a Trump by his Birth Certificate”

      ” A Trump and his money are parted on the radical right”

      ” I would love to, Darling, but will you Trump me in the morning?”

      …o oh oh… this is too much fun. I best take my medications and lay down….see, now I am thinking Shakespeare….

      To be, or not to be: that is the Trump:
      Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer
      The slings and arrows of outrageous Trump,
      Or to take arms against a sea of Trumps,
      And by opposing end them? To die: to sleep;
      No more; and by a sleep to say we end
      The heart-ache and the thousand natural Trumps
      That flesh is hair to,….

So... In the spirit that Larry is promoting..... I would like, well, or gosh, it would be nice.... if anyone would visit her space and do some leap-blogging and add to the thread.... you know it could be fun.... so.....have a little sunshine..... I am off for a beer.

Monday, October 22, 2012

Fun with the Kids... and finding out my son is related to Bill Cosby

the kids just break me up!  It has been really really fun to have Bubba home for the weekend... will be sad when he gets back on the plane.  He has some really talented friends.  Hopefully one of them will help him get some work with film when he gets to LA early next month.

One of them did a little photo-shop of him..... and thought he looked a bit like Bill Cosby.... you decide....

.... except for the shorter hair.... and Max could never afford such a nice sweater.  (nor keep it in such good condition)

Thursday, October 18, 2012

no time for blogging

.... Wonder Boy is flying in from Oregon for a long weekend.  Having breakfast with him and the Wonder Girl.

....Cheese is on the menu.

Friday, October 12, 2012

YUPPERZ  I watched the debate last night.  Joe kinda slammed the 'New Young' Republican.... showing the spirit he had/has from way back.

Clearly pointed out that the 'Ryan(Romney) plan will still not disclose the "LOOP HOLES AND DEDUCTIONS" they want to use to BALANCE the budget.  Vague and elusive.....that is the republican way.  " I won't tell you what I think, because you really don't need to know".... seems to be the campaign strategy for the Romney team.  Gees.... if you will not disclose information..... when you need to.... you are lying.  It's that simple.  It ain't goodam brain surgery, here.  If you have sex with a woman, and tell her you have had a vasectomy when you haven't... that is lying.  If you have sex and DO NOT tell your partner you have the CLAP when you do and know it...... THAT IS LYING TOO..... Romeny/Ryan have the equivalent of a sexual disease, and seriously if you vote for them.... boy you will be pissing blood and pain for the next four years!

Oh shit..... where's the meds?

In good news.... I went to Ann Coulter's page...... as long as I was thinking of diseases, see..... and well..... it seems to have a problem....must be a mucous discharge.  I googled 'Ann Coulter Mucous Discharge'.... had better luck with Ann Coulet seeriously Deranged.  Fun with Internet, huh?

..... anyways.... back to the bird story....

 I think it was about 4:30 or so when I got up to search for Gomez.... big cup of coffee and a couple of hits of Gold Bud and I hit the streets agiain with the tin of pot seeds and the mirror and bell... started scrounging the neighbor at Dawn's Early Light..(used to be a strip club by that name, see... and boy..was it a nice place.) Anyways... in only a half hour I could hear him...chirping away " Hello! Hello!  What a Good Bird!"... the normal drivel he would say plus some of the whistles I had taught him....that little bugger was in a tall hemlock... just a block from the house.  He hadn't gotten far!  I crept delicately to the tree... shook the tin of pot seeds, whistled a bit and called his name.  There was silence.  Then I spotted him, at the edge, peering out at me.  I whistle again and shook the morror at him.  The narcissist little shit fell for it!  He flew down a lit on my finger!  In a flash I pinched his feet so he could not escape and the palmed him in my fist to complete the capture.  It was then that I noticed an old lady looking out at me from her was her tree, see.  Now at five am...I must have kind of looked suspicious.  My beard then was thick and black and the hair cascaded to my shoulders.  There was a phone call to the police coming up soon.  I acted quick though, fueled by early moring coffee and some really righteous Colombian Gold Bud.  " Lady... I caught my Bird!" and held up the captured fugitive.  I am not sure what she made of it all, but I got my ass back home as soon as possible.

Mission accomplished!  and I had enough time to shower and met the guys for the
Brewer game ride to Milwaukee!  He was HOME!  Ok.... this is when weird took over.  See, after my shower I was rolling a couple of joints for the ride south, having a few puffs as I did.  I had also slipped him a bud in his seed dish, figuring, " Oh, well, welcome back."  I was also ranting on him... like, see, what a bad bird he was for flying off and how much I would have missed him and how lonely I would be without him.... ok...I was a young hippie talking to his what!  But he came close to the edge of the cage, as if he was taking this all in, and being reflective about it.

Just when I was about ready to leave. he scratched his head with his feet, which is a really neat trick, you gotta admit, but don't try it.  I did.  Doesn't work.  And then he wsaid.... "Sorry.  Didn't mean to bum you out.  just remember though..
"If you are lonely when you're alone, you are in bad company."

... well boy, was I amazed....... listen I must finish this later.... got hit the social club at Oblios

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Rain, Mini-Mitt and Back to the Bird Story...or Such

Ain't no sunshine today.  Rain and clouds and a feeling of creeping discontent.  Romneystiltskin has revealed his plan.... he will 'balance' the budget by killing Muppets and defunding libraries and museums, the arts.  Screw him.  Tonight Joe Biden tackles Mini-Mitt.... I hope he rips the little asshole a bigger one.  Ryan should be on the cover of a magazine...... "Vague".  For once Sarah Palin was right.... 'you can put lipstick on a dog.... but it is still a dog'

  I cannot stand that little geeking bit of hair in the center of his the sign of the financial fucking vampire or something. Ah, the humanity....the HANNITY...OH oh lord... I must go take my liberal doses.

Not kidding.  Somewhere along the line of trying to get my eyes fixed I ended up taking a physical (and that had been years) and they discovered that I had high blood pressure, which is weird, maybe, cause after donating, like almost ten gallons of blood over the years..... I had always had very very very normal blood pressure.... andanyways they did another test, cause I told them I was getting these abnormal cramps in my right leg... so anygoddamways, I now have a small stash of drugs to take......and I had developed a pretty good aversion to legal drugs a long time ago and illegal drugs awhile now this shit I take to make me sleep gives me these weird ass dreams.... not too bad, cause I am sleeping and all, but they do come in, the dreams in very vivid colors and snarky dialogue& stuff.... kinda reminds me of the early 70's when I had a nice affection for mescaline.  Soreallyreally...the other night I had a dream and in it I was a talkshow host (go figure) and my Ed McMahon was an old girlfriend from college, Muffy (who was so much NOT a 'MUFFY  which is why we called her that.... I mean she looked Sicilian, but kind of spoke with an accent that was more like the Finns up in the UP.  Wore her hair all frizzed out, had fur jackets, and called me "Sweetie" so much that I sometimes wondered if she really knew my name.)

.....  and Muffy could not say 'squirrel"... kind of sounded like "Skurl".  But there she was, after 35 years, in my dream, on my talk show.... and she would say "Skurl" and the audience would laugh and then she would say it again, and more laughter.... and the dream would go on and on and on.  So.... there you are.... weird goddam dreams, but at least I am sleeping. Butanywayz....

.... I was talking about my parakeet....Gomez a bit ago....and I got distracted.  That is an easy enough thing to do what with the health issues and the drugs and stuff.

See, me and the bird were getting along real well.....he was the only roommate I had for awhile and we got along just fine.  Most nights he would just sit in the window and check out the world, others he would just park himself on my shoulder as I watched TV or did whatever.  Got to the point where I hardly noticed him sitting on my shoulder..... kinda like a wart you just get used to.  I guess I got used to it just a little too much... and just like in life, you take things for granted and you just get a little too casual and that is when bad things happen.  And that is what happened....a bad thing.  Now, I am a nice guy and it wasn't some horrific he flew into a fan or got sucked up into the vacuum or any such stuff, but just like I remember Muffy, and she never was a roommate, but that may have been a interesting thing, too, but what happened with Gomez just about broke my heart.  See, it was the garbage what done it.  Truly.

 I was not a big fan of taking out the garbage, cause it was a long walk to the back and all, and seeing as I lived alone, I mean, what is the big deal about a little, and I mean little, bit of stench in a bungalow that you live in by yourself?  So, I remember it was a Saturday and the smell was getting to be a bit much and the weather was forcasting a bit of heat and I planned to go to Milwaukee the next day to watch a Brewer game.  Not that I am much of a baseball fan, see, but back then games were cheap(er) and there was a whole crew going..... Lightning Dolt and Wheels and his brother Spare, Kid Curry and Tim and Bruiser...... and four or five cases of beer.  We were set, see, so just around dusk I thought I best clean Gomez's cage and take the garbage out.  I was sure enough thinking I would not want to do it when I got back... and if I figured right, the smell WOULD bother me with a hangover.  So I cleaned the cage, got that bag pried out of the kitchen (it had kinda stuck to the floor,see, and I then had to clean up that mess and well, gee, I just wasn't thinking when I walked out the back door with that bag and it was only about when I was almost to the back of the garage that I realized that Gomez was still sitting on my shoulder.

Well.... I stopped ... and looked at him.  I was clutching that goddam bag with both hands so it would not bust out any more than it already had so I could not grab him quickly. He looked right back at me........... and like a green flash.... flew off.  I distinctly remember thinking...."Fuck", dropping the  garbage all over the drive and shouting at the top of my lungs, "Fuck".  I could be articulate when upset, even in those young years.

I ran back to the house and got his favorite bell and mirror and that little tin of Pot seeds he liked so well and in the waning daylight went scouring the neighborhood for him..... to no avail.  Couldn't see him or hear him.  I must have covered my block several times and the next block and the block after that.  Finally in the pitch dark, I gave it up and went home.  Now to say that I was distressed is mild.  He was more than a pet, more than just a mere companion......why.. he was like ....well, a bird to me.

There in the empty gloom of the room I went into a funk... his cage empty and vacant, a reminder of what a dumb shit I could be.  I did a shot of whiskey, ,,,, I rolled a consoling joint.... and then.... I sprang (well, just mentally) into action.  I made up an ad to put in the paper... "Lost, Talking Bird"... I thought there would be a chance he would just fly into someone's house or something.  I would have put the Ad on Craigslist, too, but the internet was still just a gleam in Al Gore's eye.  I resolved to get up early and search again.  Parakeets do not fly well in the dark.... in fact, not at all.  If I got up early, and I was getting up early anyway to go to Milwaukee, maybe I could track him down just before sunrise.  I felt better.  There was a plan.  Hope is a plan.

Hope is also a poem by Emily Dickinson.....

Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune--without the words,
And never stops at all,
And sweetest in the gale is heard;
And sore must be the storm
That could abash the little bird
That kept so many warm.
I've heard it in the chillest land,
And on the strangest sea;
Yet, never, in extremity,
It asked a crumb. 

anyways.... I was gonna get that Bird back.

Sunday, September 23, 2012

A beery intelude

( I will get back to my story about Gomez.... but yeaterday was  busy Day...My friend Lee's book came out yesterday and I went to his inaugural book signing...

Lee found the original recipe for the Old Chief Oshkosh Pilsner from the 1950's and talked the good folks at Fox River Brewing to whip up a batch.... wasn't too bad at all.

I guess it went well.  When I got there at 1:00 there already was a line to buy the book.  Lee said I have a 'photo-credit' or something or other on page 152...STUFF!

Anyways.... I know most of the rest of the Free World outside of Wisconsington really really wants to buy a copy... more info

 Billa Lang has a credit of some sort, too, but I guess he gets his on page 2 or some such.... probably cause he shot the photo from his plane or some deal.

Billa got so excited he went and gamble on one a dem gamboling machines at Oblio's and won some money and bought me some beersa and a shot of tequila.  Every book needs a happy ending likie dat, see!  The newaspaper even took some  time to write a neat article HERE

Anyways.... the dude is a really nice guy, with a sweet as all get out girlfired.... and there is nothing like being happy for a ffriend.

Friday, September 21, 2012

Politics, Stinky Cheese and Philosophy from the Bird

 AndAnd  the Republican New Thing is just say NO.  I will not release my tax forms.  It is none of your business what nefarious deals I have done or where I have hid my money or where my money comes from.  NO NO NO....  which I think is really funny coming from a Political Party that is so afraid of fraud that they want every voter to have an ID.... except them.... and ID of responsible fiscal dealings.
The new candidate for the Senate seat, former Governor Tommy Thompson.  Believes in saying NO.

Well, the Ex-Governor of Wisconsin, (R) Tommy Thompson is running for the Senate seat that will be vacated by the retirement of (D) Herb Kohl.

Tommy is not new.... he was Wisco Governor for fourteen years before resigning to accept a post in the Bush Cabinet.  He 2000 he penned the GOP party plank opposing all abortions...NO exceptions.....

"As in years past, the GOP has enthusiastically reaffirmed its commitment to eliminating access to abortion by once more committing to an anti-choice "no exceptions" plank in the party platform.

Well, good old Tommy probably does not want anyone to know how much money he made after leaving the Bush Admin to work for political fixers,

Now Tommy was never one to pass up freebies.... or drinks.  Wisconsin Lore has Tommy drunk at several functions.  Google Tommy Thompson 'drunk' and there are a couple of clips to choose from, but sadly, not enough.  His terms as Governor were slightly before 'citizen cell phone video' days.  There is a NICE ARTICLE FROM THE ISTHMUS about Tommy cavorting down in Tampa with Ron Johnson and Scott Walker and other assorted assholes.

So.... the real deal is.... the Repubs in Wisconsington have struck again.   They have fished up a 71 year old corporate shill who will do most anything they say (if you give him enough Scotch) to run for a Senate seat to go with Senator Ron Johnson (who works on a strictly cash basis) to team up with Scott Walker and Paul Ryan.


OK.... that is as far as I got... a couple of weeks ago.  I just can't write about that old drunk fuck...cause that is what he is...kind of a standing joke around Wisco.  But some folks still like him..... rather like Mayberry likes Otis the drunk. The guy would be almost 80 when he would finish his first senate term.... but he would deliver on his promise of 'less government'  Which in Tommy's case is a promise to do nothing at all.  Ron Johnson has held up that promise very well in his two years as Senator,   He has propose 'SIX bills.... none of which has been enacted.  But then Ron is a real dumb shit so less government from him is probably as good a deal as a concerned citizen would want.

Ya, I don't know what it is lately with Wisconsin throwing all these trash people out into the publick arena.  Gees, alla I can say is 'Sorry' it wasn't my idea.


Well anyways...... see, everytime I try to write something I get sucked back into thinking politics.... and lately.... boy, does that stink.  Well, anyways..... my buddy, Billa Lang, got me going a couple of weeks back talking about Stinky Cheese.... Which, see, is Limberger, and to just lay a bit of info on you.... is ONLY made in Wisconsin....or I guess there is a spot in Canada and I think if you go to Germany you can still find it, BUT.....and let me tell you>>>> IT really does stink...(but tastes good) and Billa laid some info on me that AGED BRICK smells almost as bad... and if you eat enough of both with a couple of beers and some onions with the can truly make you bathroom a toxic zone the next morning. Course there are other things that can make the bathroom a toxic zone, like watching the Chicago Bears, or listening to ABBA or ....well, gees, I'm sure everyone gets the idea. Really. But honestly, I ate a bunch of that Brick Cheese and stuff....... I couldn't stand myself in the morning>  But, like Billa said, just open some of either up in a bar and NO ONE will talk politics.... or even talk with you, for that matter.  So, see, stinky cheese is a good antidote when the old news gets too much.   Don't believe me?  Somebody said Limberger is good catfish bait.... I said 'Bullshit' and they said "look it up" and I did   and gees, golly and stuff let me throw this recipe for catfish bait at you and then you tell me if you can still think of Polly-Tics, huh.

WARNING: This bait really smells bad due to the cheese and meat after a few days, I am not responsible for any bowls that are left unusable. The Bait: ingredients
1 carton of Limburger cheese
1/2 pound of ground hamburger meat
a box of wheaties
1/2 can of beer ( doesnt matter what kind)
garlic powder
chicken liver blood from one or two containers
SECRET INGREDIENT: 1 can of longcut Copenhagen, id rather use grizzly straight though its cheaper and id chew the longcut myself ha ha.
 Now to put it all together
1. Grab a decently large bowl
2. mix limburger cheese and hamburger meet together
3. cover this mixture with garlic powder and mix in the 1/2 can of beer
4. add the chicken liver blood
5. dump in your can of chew
6. mix in your Wheaties or cornflakes till the bait is good and thick
7. put in a container, a coffee can works great
8. now for the stinkiest part, set the can outside in a hot area that gets a lot of sun for 2-3 days and then go fishing! good luck


HA... good luck is right!  But.... is any body reading still thinking of politics????  Nope.  And you are also probably thinking that you will never eat fish again.  There are other things to put on a plate next to the cole slaw and fries on a friday night..... but Catfish ain't one, I bet.

not really Gomez.... but he looked like this
ok..... if you gotz this far.... it is time to talk about really really serious stuff.  See, my friend Jean at Snoring Dog Studio  wrote this nice thing about how her dogs inspire her to avoid cynicism and it is a nice readl  Do check it out......but it reminded me of when my bestest pet, Gomez, taught me philosophicle stuff.

My Dad gave him to me.  He hatched the bird from an egg......and boy, did Dad have to sit on it very carefully.  (kidding, but only slightly)_See, my old man had Polio as a kid, which kinda limited him later in life to stuff he could do.... like, he never went skiing  or skating and pole vaulting was just plain out of the question.  So he raised birds.  First it was racing pigeons, but his sons got to big to crawl up into the loft coop he had built and he got a plot of land in the country to raise pheasants....but then his sons were all off to college and there was no one to run out there in the winter to take care of them,  (I know all dat's true) and so he finally settled on finches and parakeets and small parrots in his basement.  Drove my Mom nutz, but Dad always was a loving and giving man and he always thought of that particular thing as his gift to her. Thoughtful guy.

Anyways.... one day he shows up and he has a present for me... DIS itty bitty bird and a cage. He never asked me if I wanted one and it would have made no difference anyway.  There it was and it was now mine.  The damn thing could barely fly, it was that young.  Mostly, those first days, it just ran around the bottom of the cage and once in awhile looked out at me.  That was the extent of our relationship for a few weeks.
Now the place I lived in then...and for almost ten years, was just a small 850 sq ft bungalow right off campus.  I had a roommate the first year, but he worked nights and I worked days so it was almost like having the place to myself.  When Kenny then moved in with his girlfriend, Pete moved in, but it was more like a place for him to store clothes as he mostly was at his girlfriends.  My girlfriend, who became my wife, who became my ex-wife, was still finishing school and working nights.  Mostly for a bunch of years it was just Gomez and I.

I taught him to talk.  It wasn't that hard.  I spoke, he spoke back.  When he did say thing right thing.... he got what he wanted. And that is the way it was, for a long time.
The place was a shotgun bungalow, back kitchen, dining room , front room and a couple of bedrooms on the side.  Gomez;s cage hung from the bottom of a suspended bookshelf in the front room.  When I would come home at five he would scurry around the bottom of his cage and say " Let me out, let me out."  I would latch the door open and he would then fly a few laps around the house and then find a perch for the evening....either the bookshelf, the window sill or my shoulder.  He became very companionable.  His vocabulary increased to include 'What a good bird." Hello, hello." "Eat shit" (which he always had problems with)  Now him and I really started to get along.  I taught hem to play cribbage and sip whiskey.  Fond of Kessler;s, that bird, and he surely did love flipping cards around.... didn't matter much to him that he never won a game or that I cheated terribly, he just loved that game.
He generally eschewed the bird bath thing, too, much preferring to just shower under a slow trickle of water in the kitchen sink.  His other passion was squawking back at the time&temperature lady on the phone, which, truth be told, was one of my favorite things to do.  See, you could swear and bitch at the time&temp lady as much as you wanted and gosh, she would be just as nice the next day!  It was a good release for me and I think Gomez caught on to it well.  If I did not dial that number for him quick enough he would land on my face, tear my glasses off and the fly to the phone and march around it till I dialed for him..... see, no matter how much I tried, I could not teach him to dial and gees, he never figured out how to hold the hand set.  Dumb bird.

It became an enjoyable routine.  I would set the timer on the TV so he could listen to Phil Donahue in the afternoons....we would play cards, sip whiskey...he decidedly did not like beer, or he would just sit on the window sill perusing the outside world.  Things were fine..... until the day of the great calamity.

(to be continued....gotza headache& stuff)

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